devastatingly human

i agree with hong. i could never write like those of old. sigh, i feel a tinge of shame for neglecting this which is essential to me. i haven't been blogging, no.. i haven't been writing, been caught up with the stupid party. don't get me wrong i had fun, i had fun watching my girls having fun and i want to thank all my beloveds for showing up, helping me man the counter, being trigger happy, dancing queen ecstatic; thanks for early birthday cakes and the lovely flowers. thanks for sticking by me all these years/months :)

i feel this sudden wash of gratitude breaking upon my sandy heart. "i'm praying desperately for new people to come leave their watershed several, little imprints, their toenails dug deep into my wet sandy heart, a stick trail scrawling heartsy patterns and names with circles over the letters "i"."

i remember typing that, while chasing stormy clouds. hearts and names with circles over the letter "i"s have already been indelibly scrawled in. i just never really appreciated the truth in full view.

lazy baby lazy baby what a glorious moonlit night. it's been a while since i've tried to compose a repertoire with damp locks and a starry night in tow. i shan't try too hard. Words should be familiar yet simple enough to be poignant. the kind of dust we brush off our sleeves, the kind that rolls off tongues, the kind we sing, the kind that lolls away in waves of uncomplicated fludity.

words are child's play.

and i typed the following in another blog of mine not too long ago:

suspended up in midair, my boxey diva room. a rope that hangs from the sky, a cube of a room, a vault in secrecy and of esotericism and the sweetest scent poised, skimming the air as it twirls round and round before reaching my ears.

Your words are cold and flat, and i deserve much more than that..

the truth indeed. last night i was hanging on a thread. bet you didn't know the heaviness of the sigh that expired inside.

What a difference a day makes..

what would i do without jazz.

i cried certain tears last night. they were few but rare. and you know i can't type this in Iridescentia for the simple reason that you might be watching. and i cried not for you but for me. for the simple reason that i'm fatigued beyond cognizance and tired of the games i put myself through.

s.i.g.h

walking down to the water's edge
where i have been before
i don't find my love some time
i'm walking out that door
some may come and some may go
no one seems to be
the person i've been searching for
the one whose meant for me.

and i shall now attempt to dilute this inchoate attraction with intangible results of books, music and the mirth of girly laughter and fun.

ahh.. I bore you. i bore myself in circles.

goodnight darlings

Joyce Lim unzipped at 11:58 PM with 0 comments
- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -

Comments: Post a Comment