Friday, April 22, 2005

whatever things

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I tried to be modelisque


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how now brown cow?


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my KFC zinger babe


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my soulmate


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bimbos with halos


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wenyi and i. at national stadium for the recent rugby sevens


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devastatingly gorgeous


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Singapore team. whatever -_-

Joyce Lim unzipped at 10:35 PM with 3 comments
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Wednesday, April 20, 2005

galore


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My babyyyy


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I've marked and branded him. his mine for life


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hongy's NEW PLACE! new room new everything. it's awesome. i shall be a frequent neighbour and make myself such a nuisance


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zhimin's room is more discodiva. i like.


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what did you expect? US la durh.

stay tuned for rugby photos. :]
and i'm supposed to be sleeping or planning tml's literature lessons. wth
toodles

Joyce Lim unzipped at 11:19 PM with 0 comments
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Monday, April 18, 2005

i typed this out because

i got a teaching job at a neighbourhood school. teaching literature. i can't tell you how happy and grateful i am. i was just lying in bed one day in the morning shade, thinking of the jobless state i was in; and mumbled incoherent thoughts that went like something of a divine plea. and 2 seconds later my hp rang with a job offer. thank God. my favourite subject n i get to teach it :)

so, i was thrown with the Diary of Anne Frank. i was indifferent. but now i'm drawn into her world of despondency and childhood innocence. to think the germans, utter utter bestiality. just evil pure evil. and i have to teach this to my sec twos. imagine that! how can fourteen year olds ever comprehend the horror the world had to face just only half a century ago? and these so called eager young minds bombard me with questions like, "Teacher, why must study her diary? her diary so boring."
and i try to make them appreciate the hard times she had to go through. Indeed as hong said, subjects like physics, maths, chemistry, even english, merely require the understanding and grasping of concepts. but literature cannot be learnt, she must be appreciated. and my dear students get a kick out of Anne Frank, using her as a butthead for ridiculous banter. and they don't know how it breaks my heart reading her diary, seeing the world through her eyes, sensing her increasing restlessness and despondency, marvelling at her acute perceptiveness of the things around her, sharing her rising bosom of faith whenever her radio provides news of Allied invasions.

and we tell the Chinese to let go of the bitterness towards Japan. How? i'm a 3rd generation socialite and already i feel the pang of hatred and loathing towards such acts of revulsion. the slow burn ashing the edges of my heart. that truly was how the age of Man came crashing down.

so i give my kids photographs of the horrible holocaust to evoke some semblance of sympathy out of them, so that they can, once again, appreciate what Anne had to go through. i must concede it is manipulation on my part. and yet again, i was happily disappointed with their response. spectacles by the thousands on the ground beside Auschwitz, and this student raised his hand with a "it's only spectacles what Ms Lim".

-_-

and they say one death is a tragedy; a million, a statistic.

Joyce Lim unzipped at 12:07 AM with 2 comments
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Sunday, April 10, 2005

stillness

i pray everyday i smell the acrid blood dripping from the crown of thorns. that everyday i realise more and more the unfathomable love You have for me. that my eyes will be open, and the windows to my soul hinged back to the sills of heavens.

You straddled two crosses. one which yearned for you; the other mocked you. Eternal choices have eternal consequences. now i finally understand that you loved enough to let them make their individual choice.

i want to the world to know. that my Jesus loves me.
and i will claim my victory in Christ and love him back with my life at the foot of the cross.

simply because he loves me first.

Joyce Lim unzipped at 11:22 PM with 2 comments


sleepy i am so sleepy

tired tired tired beyond repetition.
also been looking at all those books i bought from borders. i think i have approximately 10 over books i've bought but left untouched. recently i re-organised my study room bookshelf. i must have thrown away about a 100 books but still the books spill over onto the floor. i tried rearranging my books according to authors but found it too tedious. i tried rearranging the books according to Dad's, Mom's and Mine, but i gave up halfway. too many too many.
too little time, patience and energy

why you ask. because i have so many things to accomplish. i don't know exactly what exhausts my time and strength these days.

i owe two letters. one's been overdue for about 7 years, the another one.. about 2 months. i owe my mom hundreds of dollars because she refuses to cover my expenses now that i'm jobless. she thinks peanuts earned from tuition is enough to get me by.
WHATEVER. i'm done arguing.

and i have to plan lessons for my tuition kids, check out Popular every now and then to buy new assessments for them. creatively think of thought provoking but interesting lessons that would make sustaining attention span and learning synonymous. and everything else just eats at me day by day. my books.

my books especially. they haunt me everyday. reminding me of how much leisure time i actually have for myself. None. which is why i don't pick them up anymore. which is such a shame because i am actually very much eager to delve into them. like yesterday i was thinking of spending an afternoon away at citylink with a good book and hot latte; the way i used to do. No time no time.

and i heave an immense sigh doggedly pursuing the things of what? i don't even know. But God grants peace and sleep to those he delights in. I sleep soundlessly, beautiful without a snore.

my only request be that He allocate more time for sleeping.

Joyce Lim unzipped at 3:21 AM with 0 comments
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Wednesday, April 06, 2005

ironing out

it is not funny when you make a pun on my starsign. and just for the record, i don't believe in astrologically based biological predictions.
and it is not funny when you start laughing congratulating yourself on being the most witty among us in the room to start a joke like that.

and it is most indecorous to start a tease by saying something like, "tsk tsk joyce joyce,what's wrong with you man. high fever, body aches, headaches, cancer la"

and then you proceed to HAHA me like a byline.

FUCK YOU.

and i laugh with you. only because i can

but won't cry

Joyce Lim unzipped at 1:10 AM with 0 comments
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Friday, April 01, 2005

the bud that grew


am listening to Renee now. it brings back so much more than just love and romance.
I miss the past. vestiges of which reside solely in me, cut and snipped into pieces which fit snugly so; enabling me to remember the things i want to; the way in which i want to.

Could you ever miss yourself? and miss what you were before you became you.. now.
I spend every waking hour floating in pipe dreams of never never land and complicated pasts of the simple me.

in short. Jazz is evocative, it uncaves a deep yearning cavern inexplicable.

Joyce Lim unzipped at 1:30 PM with 0 comments
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