Tuesday, October 10, 2006
The cracks are starting to show. the apogee is giving way to the steady slope downwards. The time when everything was going so well seems far behind in the gloom.
Everything is against me. Circumstances, and the Makers of circumstances.
It's not so bad now actually, really, i can still handle it. I can still afford to take one step towards the precipice and look down. The deep breath before the plunge. I feel like plunging down before the breath and escape from all these. I feel like letting go. sometimes. of us. of us all.
and then i remember the people who have wronged or offended me, and darkness takes over me, and unnatural thoughts form likely deaths for each of them. i hate, to the very pits. I gall myself like salt to wound, like fuel to fire, like hatchet to hate. And i tremble, literally shaking with the frenzied energy wrath lends, like a dog's hackles viciously raised, i tremble, and my whole being quakes with embittered and savage desire.
i need sleep. others say i'm growing dangerously thin. I don't know why. i love food. there must be another reason.
ok let me remind myself of happier carefree times. Of things that touch nearer my heart than my head, thanks to my godbrother for a wonderful birthday present.
Joyce Lim unzipped at 1:08 AM with 0 comments
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