devastatingly human

a friend asked if one could ever love somebody without even knowing them in the first place. well damn girl, read this, and i think you'll find this previous entry an apt reply to your question.

and i am photowhore again..
pardon her highness incurable addiction to machines with flashlights.

SHE DOESN"T HAVE ONE. ok?

Click here for photos on The Wedding, which was yday night.

today i was on the expressway in the car when i saw a propagandish government advertisement at the back of the bus in front of us. it read "Speeding Overturns Lives", and it just so happened that the bus number was hung upside down.

and then it hit me how a sudden change of heart could have made things so very differently. there i was, primary 3, in an unknown school, fishing for a crumpled dirty piece of paper and placing it on my desk for confirmation. apparently this was the last day for the form to be handed in and i didn't even know what it was for. it was addressed to "Dear Parents", so i didn't bother to read it considering i wasn't one and i already had two which was more than enough. i was supposed to have given it to my parents, but i forgot. so there it was, crinkled and yellowed and frayed, signature-less and the teacher was reiterating the deadline with edgy tone. i don't know what possessed me then to swish up a pen and trawl out a dubious name.

i wasn't thinking. i handed it in.

the next year i shifted to a new house, a new school and a new sub gifted class.

and i shall just reiterate what i've always been saying. it's my job to chronicle and dispatch my life, but it is always somebody's else's job to thresh out and cerebrate them. so make anything out of it what you will.

yan dearie i miss you so. i am currently now in that you would call the cathexis.. stage? or journey.. yes journey

"the intimacy of a friendship corresponds with the discrepancy between the chemistry of the pertinent parties and external influences which dilute this inchoate attraction: time, books, love etc."

How true.

i haven't been blogging much i'm sorry about that. been pretty busy lately. mostly cos i've since acquired a baby, a hickey on my neck caused by a biopsy done at the hospital, new friends, caught up with old ones, new schedules, new forms to fill and old feelings to feel.

i give up. i'm done with this.

Joyce Lim unzipped at 9:45 PM with 7 comments
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Comments:

having read your 2nd previous post, i can't help but wonder if you've found a partner? if so congrats!

P.S dont mean 2 intrude though

-reader of ure blog-

# posted by

Anonymous : 3/14/2005 3:52 AM

joyce dearie, i was juz abt 2 sms u when i checked yo blog! havent talked 2 u 4 so long.ive deleted msn - 2 distracting.

crunch-time looms near,
it's failure i fear.

hope ure well.ill be home abt 20th may? catchya den. dis time u got no excuses 4 not picking me up :P

muackz

# posted by

yan : 3/14/2005 9:35 AM

dearie! ya i missed you so was reading through ur blog yday. where's my letter that never reached me?

u can be sure i'll be there with a big BIG hug and ready smile when u come back ya and as u said, kick arse for law hav a little confidence pls

anoynomous: no i've not found a partner. is there somebody i should know? haha

# posted by

Joyce Lim : 3/14/2005 11:42 AM

so when did your parents know that you were officially changing sch nxt yr?

# posted by

Anonymous : 3/14/2005 10:04 PM

haha kaisiang can u stop asking silly questions

# posted by

Joyce Lim : 3/14/2005 11:28 PM

you look realy nice ;)

# posted by

Anonymous : 3/14/2005 11:45 PM

so r u or r u not attached now?>?

# posted by

Anonymous : 3/15/2005 8:54 AM